Tampa's Maddon: Insane Wino

Wonderful Tannins, hints of crazy... Joe likes it!

Ted Heads, we've got to come clean ... we occasionally still read the New York Times. You may remember our blogtastic beat down we laid upon the Gray Old Ladies' "Business / Entertainment Writer" (A position that still baffles us), David Carr after he took a swipe at TL where we vowed never to 'purchase' the NY Times again - key word "purchase." Rest assured Ted Head's, when we do happen upon the king of liberal rags we do our part to bleed this American journalistic institution dry by neither paying for it nor clicking through the ads - How's that buyout offer look now Mr. Carr?

In all fairness, when we occasionally find our birthday presents or glassware wrapped in the Times, we tend to read it. That's how we came across this little gem in Monday's paper - a typical "look at the parochial peasants, 'they're not New York City, how quaint, how odd!'" piece about the current success of the Satan Rays. The juiciest stuff, and most relevant to the Cub's upcoming series, is the insight the Times article shares with us about the sheer insanity of Ray's Manager, Joe Maddon:

After Friday’s victory, Maddon, who has several shelves stocked with wine in his office, had a half a glass of red wine sitting on his desk. A sign above the door says “Got Wine?” and on the wall is a framed picture of The Cat in the Hat and a quote from Dr. Seuss.

“Be who you are and say what you feel,” it says, “because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” Maddon wears dark-rimmed glasses and uses phrases like “therein lies the difference” and “based on good reconnaissance.”

Huh? We get the drinking part (we've been to Tampa) but quoting Dr. Seuss to a bunch of 25 year olds with million dollar bonus' and hordes of groupie love seems a bit much. The relevance of the dark-rimmed glasses (he's just like a Manhattanite!) also escapes us - how does looking like Ira Glass make one a better baseball manager?

Ultimately, we're going to file this little vignette as another data point in how any half-wit drunk could manage an American League baseball team. Let's face it, the pitcher not batting means no double switches, less situational thinking, more advantageous defensive alignment (leaning on the DH to sacrifice a bat for a slick glove in the field), and a much less tactical game. Joe Torre even used to let his players manage the Yankees in late season games, do you think that would ever occur in the NL?

Joe Maddon's response to his free time - drinking wine and reading Dr. Seuss... sounds like a typical Saturday night at Williams.

Dempster tonight, against stud left hander (and friend of the TLFC) Scott Kazmir. Despite Kazmir's awesomeness, with Maddon at the helm of the Rays, we like our chances.

** A Special Ted Lilly Fan Club Congratulations (ASTLFCC) to Overnight Pete who recently welcomed his first legitimate child into the world. The worlds youngest Ted Head, Overnight Ava weighed in at 6.75 pounds and looks to be a lefty. **