What, in sweet jesus, has gotten into Ryan Theriot? Lil guy stroked another home run and followed that up with a triple in a big Cubs Derby Day win over the Fish. While yesterday our TLFC scout down in Louisiana theorized that the Riot got strong by wrasslin gators and boxing hurriances, today we must take a hard look at whether or not Riot has been following the medical advice of Doctors Miguel Tejada, Jose Canseco and Rafeal Palmerio.Not to be outdone in the power department, Ted Lilly followed up his last un-Ted outing with a supreme performance: striking out 10, walking none and only giving up Cody Ross' solo homer in the fifth. He also helped the cause w/ a scorching two-run double.
With the win, Ted has now beaten every single team in the major leagues. He also became the first Cubs pitcher with 10-plus strikeouts and 2-plus RBIs in a single game since Mark Prior on Sept. 21, 2005.
Ted Lilly now stands at second in the NL in wins, tied for first in number of walks given up and, in our minds, a leading contender for NL Cy Young (yes--we're serious but that might be the Sunday Funday Sanka talking).
We just need Johan Santana to implode, Bronson Arroyo to proactively decide to focus more on his dbag band/hair and Jason Marquis/Joel Pinero to remember that they are, in fact, Jason Marquis/Joel Pinero so please get out those voodoo dolls TedHeads.
Ted's apprentice, Carlos Zambrano, gets the ball today....
17 comments:
Wonder if Riot pulled a Dr. Evil and stole some of Ted's mojo?
I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility that the Riot decided to finally listen to the sage advice of a certain Theodore Roosevelt Lilly?
Sure, the kid could always hit, but you could say the same for so many young pitchers out there about that craft as well. It might be "good enough" for most to go out there and pitch a good game or "keep the team in the game", but that just doesn't cut it for Mr. Lilly.
Hopefully, he passed along some of these secrets to the Riot as well. Hitting well is only "good enough".
Has anyone ever noticed that Ted looks like Strong Sad off of Homestarrunner.com? Me and my wife have now started calling him strong sad. Great Work Strong Sad. You are the man. GO CUBS.
Maybe we should organize a TLFC field trip down to mexico for "B-12 shots"?
Consider the voodoo dolls out TLFC!! Ted is a God in my eyes and deserves the Cy Young. (and my undying love and devotion, but that's just a restraining order waiting to happen)
Make that two restraining orders, JJ. I have an unnatural (and probably grossly inappropriate) love for Ted. Ted just has that power over women, I suppose......
As TedHeads, we never need to apologize for our admiration of Ted and/or fondness of Ted and/or creepy need to steal his hair in order to use it for DNA replication in our TLFC Science Lab and Cloning Emporium (TLFCSLACE).
Got weird, didn't it?
make that 3 restraining orders ladies. It's those come get me eyes & his sweet temperment that makes ya just KNOW he's a freak in the sheets.
LOL....LOVE me some Kat!!!! :) Hilarious.....Maybe we should form the Ted Lilly Has A Restraining Order Against Me Fan Club (TLHAROAMFC)??????
TLFC - um, is it weird that I didn't think the comment about the hair and cloning was weird?
All of the sudden there are a lot of broads joining the ranks of the TLFC. Maybe you could organize a viewing party of "Made of Honor" or "27 Dresses" and the TLFCSC could project it on the wall at Tilly's.
By the way - I'd like to extend the invitaion to you all to the pants party....the party...with the pants...
Excuse me, Doc but "broads"? If it weren't for us ladies out there enjoying sports, whether it be for the view or the actual sport, there wouldn't be as much popularity to ANY sport, especially baseball.
You can stick ur "Made of Honor" and your "27 Dresses" wherever you, Doctor Narcissist sees fit.
When we LADIES feel the need to speak our minds of the loveliness that is Ted Lilly, we will do just so. It's no different than you ogling a hot chick in the stands and elbowing your buddy about how big her tits were.
MMMkay?
If your "pants party" is anything like I'm imagining it being, any heterosexual male wouldn't find himself near it, cuz they like women.
Doc and Kat, Ted doesn't need you two to fight. So cut it out or we will turn this car right around.
Being a Tedhead is hard and that's not because every fifth day were reminded of our own frailty and weakness when we witness TLs shining light.
No, being a TedHead is hard because we are all TedHeads. It's like riding the train. Hey, sometimes that crazy person over there is talking to much weird this early in the morning, but what am I gonna do, get off the train? No, your not going to get off this train, because it's an express train to baseball nirvana, via Cy Yound Station, conducted by a 5'10" ball of muscle and Grit named Ted Lilly.
And, for the record we liked 27 dresses, so there. We also need new pants so let us know where the party is.
The doctor is a douche, but I guess every village needs one...
Well, that had the desired response.
FYI "JJ" - as a Packers fan, your opinion doesn't count.
fyi "the doctor" as an anonymous poster, your words mean nothing to anyone especially any Ted Lover.
hey doc...gfy
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